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or…sike? I dunno. I can’t do this! I’m putting clothes in the dryer and snotty tears drip down my face. I don’t even know what I’m feeling except ICK. boys are ick – and yet…<beats head against wall/fist against chest/spirit against the universe>. I can’t imagine kissing anyone – talking to anyone else even. Sheesh. This takes time. Tomorrow is another day…I will never go hungry again.
Are you there Lord? It’s me Libby…Oh…that is a great idea – Libby takes on the church and meets fabulous christian/jewish/hindu boys? Now we’re talking. Oh the tales of baptisms/briss/ummm what to Hindu’s do?
I’m so fucked.
So we broke up. Such is life, right? All good stories start at the ending…hmmm I’m terribly close to something brilliant I think I just need a few (dozen) more glasses of wine to really get it. What I realized is the seam that held us together was a mutual distaste for so many things. We hated the same kind of people (dumb ones, ones who mistakenly believed they were smart, fake people, overly genuine people, very unattractive/attractive people, etc.), the same kind of fashion, film, books, the list goes on. I’m not really sure what we liked and I’m still struggling with that. I only now realize that I held so closely to this better-than-ness that I am not sure where I am if not above another. There are loads of questions and blame on myself that I’m squishing into the closet of my brain – wide armed, panting, with big wild eyes terrified they might jump out and take over.
It is with the fear of a secretive negative thought hoarder that I bound forward into more life. Applying for new jobs, considering a big move, taking yoga, online dating…
Wait…?
Seriously? Yes…dear readers – yes. Oh and it will be an adventure. It is why I’m back here – after only hours on a website. I realized this activity is far too rich with hilarity not to share. MadLibby does the web. Literally…figuratively…?
The end of 2011 and the beginning of my voyeuristic journey into judging humans based on less than 4000 characters and 6 or so of their best photos.
Wish me luck/hold my hand.
Xoxo,
madlibby
